Pay it Forward

Almost every family has those difficult years when they realize that it won't be the picture-perfect Christmas. Mom and Dad know there's barely or not enough money to pay the bills, much less buy presents for the kids, gifts for the teachers, mail guys, and food for all the holiday parties. Almost every family has a year when things are tight. It's almost enough to make you forget the meaning of Christmas.

This Christmas, I'd like to share with you one of my favorite Christmas memories. You might think it was the one where Santa brought me that Pound Puppy sleeping bag I wanted for a whole year, or those leather boots I wanted. And while those two rank pretty high up there, the year that leaves one of the most defining moments on my heart, was one of the hardest on my family.

I was too little to know exactly how old I was. I think maybe between 4-6 years old. Maybe younger, I don't remember- so some of the details are sketchy. I do remember that it was one of the years that my dad once again said, "there will be no presents this year". I think it was the year my dad was layed off from his job. I remember my younger brother had been sick- in the hospital alot, and now, as an adult, I think my parents had lost their health insurance when my dad was layed off. Needless to say, things were bad. There were only 3 of us 5 kids at the time, but it was tough.

The main thing I remember is that these guys from the fire department showed up at the back door, with a huge box of food and presents for us kids. I remember opening my gift. It was a stuffed pillow shaped like a little girl skunk. I remember she was so pretty, and had flowers on her head. And down on the bottom, there was a little label that had been either ironed on, or sewed, and it said my name. Amanda. I couldn't believe it. It had been made just for me. Rebekah got a little girl bunny one, and Josh a little boy bunny one. I remember I loved that skunk for years. I'm pretty sure Rebekah held onto her bunny for a long time too. I'll never forget my skunk.

That was just one of the many years that others came to our rescue. Things were always tight at our house. Five kids, someone usually sick, and maybe even in the hospital. Boxes of love at church, my grandma, lots of people.

I know now, as an adult and a parent, that it must've been so hard for my parents. Another year of not knowing what Santa would bring your kids THIS time, or even if. I know now, that my parents swallowed alot of pride to make sure that at Christmas, and even in our everyday lives, our needs were met. There were lots of beans and rice, spam and instant potatoes at my house growing up. But now, we're all grown, and going home is one of my favorite things. I'm so thankful for everyone of them.

But the point I'm trying to make is this. If you haven't done something for someone else this season, think about it. For the first time in my adult life, this year, Martin and I were able to sponsor a girl on the dove tree at church. This is something I've always wanted to do. Let me tell you that shopping for her was one of the hardest things I've ever done. I wanted to give her everything. I kept remembering my skunk pillow, and thinking that one day she might look back on this, and pay it forward to someone else. I won't see her open those gifts this Christmas, but maybe someone who loves her will, and it will mean just as much to them.

My heart is so full this Holiday season, and I hope that we can all remember to share with others the way God shared with us. Merry Christmas!